Excepting the damage it does to the roof of your mouth. 50 grit sandpaper would do less harm (it wouldn’t be as delicious though).

I’m just waiting for her next claim: That the reduction of funds for Planned Parenthood helps women.

Here’s what my morning show cast wore.

CBS This Morning: morning TV for adults.

what. the. hell.

Do you think Shia LaBeouf thinks the tweet box is the same as the place where you set your away quote for AIM?

eh. Acknowledging what others do is a good practice. If my husband and I both clean the house, we both thank each other. not because it wasn’t expected, but because it is appreciated.

No one cares about your stupid boner.

The second trimester is the best trimester. If you don’t feel good then I’ll fear for your sanity during the third (and worst) trimester.

#notallgreys

I was watching Neil deGrasse Tyson on the news this morning and they were asking him questions about the hurricane. My admiration for him went up when he said that they should ask a metrologist this questions because he wasn't an expert in this. I liked the fact he was able to admit he wasn't the best person to talk…

I’m pretty sure that top one from the wedding is cauliflower, not roses. Afterwards, they wheeled out a barrel of ranch dressing.

Why are they all cube shaped? THERE ARE OTHER WAYS TO ARRANGE FLOWERS KANYE.

Kanye is responsible for what, a quarter of all roses used by the flower industry per year? A third? Half?

I’m starting to think she’s going to talk about nothing but food for the duration of her pregnancy. That way, when the baby is born she’ll return to her previous shape, but the rest of us will be 35 pounds heavier.

THEY AREN’T EVEN TRYING ANYMORE. WHAT EVEN IS THIS.

I think Rock Steady was suuuuuper underrated. I fucking LOVED that album and jammed to it constantly.

I have two friends who are at 20 weeks and 22 weeks right now. Both are TINY girls. They look pretty much like this. Two weeks ago, nothing. Now they are clearly pregnant. These people need to fuck off. I have another girlfriend who didn’t even look pregnant until she was 25 or 26 weeks and people were equally rude -…

I haven’t smoked since Sept 24!!!!!!!!!!! And I’ve started running again and wow, I can breathe. Sometimes I take a deep breath and I’m genuinely surprised how good it feels and that I don’t start coughing like crazy. Amazing.