Sweet deal for those that still worship at the alter of the dinger, but what of those that worship The Almighty Donger Gods ? Donger> dinger!! Any day !! Totes way, dude!

The chicken B 4 the egg ? [(;-D

“You all sent me your $$$ & didn’t even get a fuckin’ car—Here’s a fuckin’ Tweet w/ a big-ol’ purple dick-shaped eggplant instead” -elon- <3 ;-/

Will this be the ignominious end of the legendary Brazilian Bikini Wax ??

“That’s the way the story goes; First your money, then your clothes.” Elizabeth will be awesomely epic in her “Wimmen In Prison” reality TV debut, though. She has that special je nes c’est quoi, ya know ? Like a nicer, softer Silicon Valley Teresa Giudice. Totally. Way.

Yea—Except Martha Stewart gots sent to the Big House for lying about her insider-trading, and so far sweet Elizabeth Holmes hasn’t lied about being a blood-sucking capitalist venture-capital pig. Yet, anyway. I think she’d be great in a “Wimmen In Prison” reality TV show though. Totally way !

Always the; Never me. (sigh)

And in a response just received from deep space Imperial Overlords Of The Universe Kang & Kodos issued the following statement:

In all fairness, on the other hand that comment is so WAY offensive to all the random honest lizard turds out there. Weak. Sad, too. Just nope.

Is DonnieT-rumpf one of James Tiberius Kirk’s many alien illegitimate space bastards that populate the galaxy—’Cause that woulds answer SO many unanswered questions, right ? Totally. Way.

Where the is a will; The is a way. Totally. Way.

Since I’mma olds. I have this funny habit. When I pay for something—-I expect to get something in return. Something besides glowing Jalopnik posts telling me just how great the alleged product is. Does that Elon Musk dude re-invest in his own product, or is he just smiling for funsies ? The ?

Just blame it on Rio. And Duran Duran. And O’bama. They shoulda just hired T-rumpf a long time ago. He’s been so way successful at everything else, right ? He woulds build a Glorious T-rumpf Velodrome & make the Mexicans pay for all of it—Even the shit-filled bay !! Pay bitches pay !! #MakeRioIgnorantAgain

Iffn I can just get someone to carry me around everywhere like that Ariana Grande person I’ll consider it a major moral and professional victory & be able to just go on living for a couple more days or so. OK ??

It’s a high-tech world in which we live. We usta have to get drunk & drive all over hell & back w/ a box of plastic letters to make random rural church signs say evil shit like “Your Mother Sucks Cocks In Hell”. Kids gots it so way easy these days. The message DOES kinds resonate, though, right ?

I see what you did there, $kay. Now I want to pre-order two more of those sweet Tesla Model 3's. That Elon Musk is just such a great guy—I don’t even care iffn I EVER get one of those sweet Teslas. The will deliver, right ?

Fuck the OTA’s—Nick Foles is gonna go to Jon Gruden’s Quarterback Camp & become an elite NFL quarterback. Or stay home & jack-off a lot. Like a QB competition w/ that Sam Bradford person woulds be any help ? Yea. Sure.

Because lying sack of pulsating diseased lizard shit took up too many words & they only had one sign. How long did TDOT leave this timely warning up, anyway ? Epic work Tex-ass pranksters !!

Taking his Twitter ques from DonnieT-rumpf here ? Harbaugh better come strong w/ the W’s this year. Losing to Utah, O State & Mi State ain’t gonna cut it up in Ann Arbor no matter how strong his Tweet-game is this year, though!

Always. Ricky Nelson hads an answer for that, too !