Amen sister.

her collarbone is to die for, tbh.

I fucking love Claire. She's the ultimate Ice Queen.

Um.

what moment was this? I think I must have been face full into my wine at this point.

That seat filler behind Meryl was EVERYWHERE.

My favorite part of this is that those two are sitting together and their reaction is basically identical. I really hope they're friends outside of forced award show interactions because that would make me incredibly happy.

Yes! Substituting big boy and girl words for pretty pictures of the people we see in the TV!

Right on!

I would so much rather wear fuzzy boots and a hat sometimes than be hot all year 'round. Ugh!

Introducing... The next Victoria's Secret Angel...

Worked at a summer camp for three years, and one of the games the staff would play would be to see who could come up with the most ridiculous lie the campers would believe. Yeah, yeah, lying to kids is like shooting fish in a barrel, but it was still fun.

One time, I was walking with a group of campers back to their…

A PENGUIN IN A PENGUIN BOOKS SWEATER

Hey guess what, I'm a vet, and I served with ALL KINDS of douchebags. You must be one of those right-wingers that think we want and/or need people like you kissing our asses all the time and serenading us with Toby Keith while throwing "Support Our Troops" magnets at us. We don't. We are not that stupid and don't…

So, then, let's talk about Mars. What do I do to prepare my child to go there?

I'm actually not a fan of the "extremely friendly" server. I won't deduct from the tip for it, because I don't want them to be punished for my tastes, but beyond refills, answering what few questions I might have, and making sure the food comes out on a timely basis, I really don't want to interact with anyone other…

I seriously don't get the people who want an "extra friendly" server. Why isn't being pleasantly polite enough? The server is there to get your food, not to be your dinner companion, and it's not possible to muster conversation and extra smiles for every single table every night.