Man, that’s a good way to get yourself Siouxed.

She seems nice.

I searched “below average” and got a nice selfie.

Why the hell couldn’t they have Maddow do it? She is leaps and bounds smarter than that putty head lauer and she is pretty good at holding people to their word. Her interview with KellyAnne Conway was one of the only ones I’ve seen where the interviewer didn’t just let her start ranting about Clinton.

Trump continues to gnaw into Hillary’s already razor-slim lead.

Except for the fact that ISIS was formed at the Abu Ghraib detention facility when prisoners held meetings, worked out a chain of command, and traded phone numbers and contacts by using Indelible markers to write it on their underwear for when they got out.

No, she lucked into an opponent who is clearly in the early stages of dementia. But also, yeah, she’s put in a fuckton of work for decades, vs Trump who breezed in on a waft of fame from hosting a reality show. If working your ass off toward a goal for 40+ years and never giving up until you get there is destiny,…

Oh yeah. I worked with a guy (quintessential Trump voter type) around 2006 who, straight-faced, said that the solution to the whole Middle East thing was to bomb it to oblivion. I asked him, straight-faced, if he meant killing tens of millions of men, women, and children, and he, straight-faced, said “yes.” I asked…

Take the oil?

Even if Trump were to drop out tomorrow, somehow never give an interview ever again, the can of alt-right worms he opened won’t go away so easily. Even when he loses and loses big, the toxic waste he unloaded on the American political system won’t just evaporate.

Jesus fuck. This is the longest SNL cold open ever.

You date the wrong camels.

This is why Trump is so appealing to a certain subsection of the population. He makes politics, including INCREDIBLY complex international relations and ethnic conflicts he or most Americans couldn’t begin to understand (and I include myself in that group), seem so damn simple. And, for some reason (a combination of…

If we were going to take the oil, we would have needed to stay in Iraq until it was dry as a camel’s vagina. So, basically forever. Iraq could have been a US possession, one strategically located next to Iran and Russia and between Disneyland Paris and Shanghai Disney. Instead, we were more interested in allowing a…

Gonna be hard to get internet access at that point. Our new Russian overlords aren’t going to take kindly to the anti-Putin sentiment around here.

6. Should read “bankruptcy"

I hope you have access to some kind of alternate universe then.

I actually don’t blame him for this position.

1. Take the oil

Never cut off an upper class soccer mom leaving the Whole Foods parking lot.