I remember when the Onion was witty and funny.

General etiquette?!?! Why the scamps! Stuntmen injures?!?!! Impossible!!!!!!

Rich bitches about a movie me conceits for the sake of story and has no idea how GPS works himself. A small gaffe but still pretty funny.

Don’t forget “I creepily took the name of an internet crush”

No:

Maybe he should have dropped his gun when police arrived. Nah, gotta be knee jerk police response

A brother with a gun running from a shooting incident.

Nah a racist shooting is far easier to swallow. 

Oh come now, Orionsangel says that it’ll work. S/he/it clearly knows better.

Wow, you’re a fucking douche bag. “WHO CARES ABOUT THIS NEW FEATURE, ITS NOT NICHE ENOUGH FOR WHAT I WANT!!!! I WANT XBOX 360 GAMES ON MY IPHONE WITH A NINTENDO GAME PAD FROM 1986!!! UNTIL THEN THIS IS STUPID!”

Heh, is a boot screen logo a valid measure of storage performance? If so, my old AthlonXP is the best in class.

But he spent a lot of time critiquing how the system looks.

We put i7s out in a business environment (i.e. a lot of multitasking and production style applications). I can see no benefit to them versus i5s except as previously mentioned, increased number of PCI-E lanes which really don’t matter except in specific use cases.

It’s good to know that the original article made no attempt to compare this things performance with any other hardware available. Ads as reporting at its finest.

Ugh, Kotaku hardware reviews. Just, no.

Nice, come to look at videos and they’re all deleted. So, the story is in fact five sentences describing obvious shit in these nonexistent videos. At least the content network click bait and Quickbooks ads are working.

You’re 100% right. But, your astute commentary does not go far enough. Microsoft should just go out of business. Totally out of business. Because clearly, they can do nothing right and they’re putting games on PC because they suck and don’t have any money. And yeah, the distinction between PC and console has gotten…

I like how the justification boils down to “it was too hard to program for the PS3.” Also the big griffin thing is the cutest ever.

Because, well, a couple of days wouldn’t kill her. I’m facing heart surgery next week - yes, the fear and uncertainty are rough. But I’m still going to go to work tomorrow. It’s called being a god damned adult.

There’s also no black people in the game. So, old men are not sexy and CDPR is full of racist Poles. Both your point and mine are marks against the game - a pox on the game and its creators.