This is no way to talk about your future employers, Tom. 

Someone got upset about an article lol

Do you even come to Deadspin on the weekends? It’s, well, dead. 

Great article... Two days late. What’s with you guys and staffing on the weekends? Terrible. 

You try rounding the bases with a peg leg and an eye-patch and let’s see how fast you are.... sheesh.

If the catcher had fielded the ball cleanly - not his fault, obviously - the runner would have been out by a mile at home.

You can’t have a post All-Star game collapse if you start it before the All-Star break

Nobody puts a cowering little bitch in a corner!

How is Boom-Shaka-Laka not on this list?!?!?!

Pens announcer Mike Lange has some of the best catchphrases ever. Some of my favorites include:

Holy fucking shit, that last dude’s dad is a war criminal. I hope you come home every year for the holiday’s and upper decker every toilet in his house. 

I have no idea what i just read but this exchange deserves the national book award.

The one cowering like a little bitch? lol

I believe this time, it was... Busch-league nonsense.

You think Torts is pissed, how about Jack Johnson’s parents who now have to buy 4 houses in Pittsburgh!

Shut up and laugh at the joke.

“Baseball players would call him Stumpy or D-Stumpf. Baseball players are the dumbest pro athletes.”

You know this is a lie because there’s no way any baseball person bothers to call Daniel Stumpf anything more creative than Stumpy. Except Cal Ripken.

(For what it’s worth, I couldn’t find any evidence of Stumpf being called “Spider Monkey” in any public setting.)

I think at this point, everyone who plays football is aware of CTE and the damages it can do. It’s a great sport to watch, but with that knowledge, it’s a play at your own risk situation. At some point, the sport is either going to dwindle away due to these risks, or there are going to be waivers out the ass that…