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What magnificent eye-candy. Darling Cary Elwes was the love-interest in my favourite high-school movie of all time. I love him.

Oh wow. That is the most horrible real-life scene I have ever seen. My heart goes out to the bride and groom and the families of everyone involved.

Ha ha! No. Silly.

No, not seriously.

Now playing

Forget Peeta. I recon the best bloke around is POIDA.

The hot toys this year are food, warmth and shelter. Same as every year.

What is unattractive?

You're joking, right?

That's brownface.

This is kind-of like when the prettiest girl in school sweeps in and fucks your boyfriend without even trying.

Elizabeth Banks is SUCH an attention whore. First she gets the haircut - du - jour, then she tries to block Jennifer out of the photo. I swear she thinks shes the star of those movies.

David Letterman was trying desperately not to laugh, and Jennifer almost broke him. I could see him thinking Where do I take this? To an old-man-diapers joke? - but that's what she wants. I can't let her win! I won't be beat on my own show by a little girl!

It's a really well-written song.

I LOVE that beard. Gives me something to hang on to!

I think that for the purpose of this article, regular women means the women in this article.

I'm in New Zealand. Also, I just said suspected. I acknowledge that it's my own paranoia about male doctors, not the reality.

I thought the Mental Health representative was going to say,

Daryl Hannah in Splash, right?

Well now, this is going to cause some confusion.

All four of these points are Advice for White People.