Eh, could have been worse.

Here’s a tip from a dog lover for people who don’t own dogs. There were some basic mistakes by the players in this video. The dog is scared. If you are seen as a threat, the dog will not come. Don’t jog up to it and expect it not to cower when you clumsily grasp at it. Just wait for it to approach you while your hand…

The lesson, as always: never tweet.

I knew it was a bad/great idea to read these comments.

Just like Oscar, this will never get old.

Mommentary

Here, me: I make the coaching motions with my noise mouth. The brain is where I live. I am crouched on the rim of the sun, observing humanity. I am the potato lotus, flowing. My beams are the beams of my teams, shining into their humanity from benches and boxes. Will I teach them the secrets of the trapezoid? I will…

General question: when is the ‘right’ time to cut ties with Johnny Manziel?

It’s like watching a Steph Curry highlight but kind of more impressive because people are allowed to hit him but didn’t. Also the fact that he’s using a stick and facing a goalie.

I’ll start by saying I’m a butthurt St. Louis native.

You’re hearing that because you want to hear that. There’s a difference between not wanting to be the face of the franchise and being a coward, which is why Wainwright made no such connection.

You’ve got such a hard on for Cardinals-bashing it’s just sad. Disclaimer, born and raised in Miami, I couldn’t give a f*** about the Cardinals. But I’m tired of seeing every single story you write turn into a self-ejaculating passive-aggressive flagelation of how the Cardinals are really the evil ones hiding petty…

Reader Brandon sent me a list of every Gronk description on Deadspin a while back, which I’ve updated since then. Here’s everything we have:

“All our knowledge begins with the senses, proceeds then to the understanding, and ends with reason. There is nothing higher than reason, except for this air ball.”

Still shot of the incident as it occurred:

This is shit reporting. He also offered a makeup exam. As an MU alum, and a former student of his, I 100% support him. He sent this before the Yik Yak posts had been made public, the university hadn’t replied to any threats whatsoever, and personally speaking, he was far and away the nicest, kindest, most lenient…

If you click through to the full email, he says anyone who doesn't want to come to class can take a make up exam.

Um... she's a lady who made a funny comment in the rainbow-cake thread.