He’s only 36. Why do Republicans always look so fucking old? I though drinking the blood of the disadvantaged would make them youthful and dewy appearing.

I can’t wrap my head around this even being an option in a court room. The way the courts keep people safe where I’m at involves the incarcerated defendants remaining cuffed through the proceedings, and a bailiff hanging nearby for the ones who aren’t cuffed. No shock collars needed and I’ve never seen a situation…

What in the fuck?!? How did I have no idea that it was somehow legal to put the equivalent of one of those dog shock collars on a human being? I find the dog shock collars deplorable. This... really?

I hope the judge and bailiff sleep well knowing their actions put a pedophile back on the street.

The judge and baliff need to be charged with torture.

Jesus. Note to Texas judges: The Life and Times of Judge Roy Bean is not a training video.

No, you meant something VASTLY more stupid. You meant that if this exact same movie somehow came into being with a completely different director yet without one thing changed about how it’s shot, written, presented, etc., I would give it a much worse review because I’m so beholden to giving Ava DuVernay a pass.

My mind is blown that you interpret this trauma as a result of being sheltered. You clearly have no idea what you are talking about.

I saw that too. I’m still wondering how everyone there ages like milk set out on a warm day.

I’m startled that no one so far has brought up abortion, or that these conservative guys have not figured out that WOMEN WON’T SLEEP WITH THEM BECAUSE THEY DON’T WANT TO BE FORCED TO GIVE BIRTH if they get pregnant by accident. I never dated any conservatives before I got married, but I sure as shit would Never, Ever…

It is not close-minded and childish to have a zero-tolerance policy towards people who agree with people and policies that are actually harmful to me as a Black woman, to Muslims, to the poor, and to non-white immigrants. If you align yourself with the Republican Party today, you don’t have the best interests of…

Survival of the fittest, dudes. Natural selection. Whatever you want to call it, the silent hand of the world is sending you signals.

“Satire”

As sassy as Barb trying on floppy hats at Target last night.

Obligatory.

as sassy as a cup of low-fat yogurt with someone’s name written on it

“Females”

as sassy as an olive-colored windbreaker from Eddie Bauer  

Like the pastors from my youth would scream into a microphone:

“This puts the armed advantage disproportionately on the side of white folks, and does little to ensure that those who might actually need fire arms to defend themselves against armed aggressors including the police have access to those firearms.”