Those guys got punched into Bolivian!

Oh, Buffalo Chess! Sure, sure.

Somewhere in Buffalo, there’s a dump site filled with only broken tables.

Johnny Manziel During Drunk Driving Arrest: I’m the quarterback of the Cleveland Browns. There’s nothing you ca—

Ben Carson can punt a football 500 yards.

Some consider Garnett to be a maniacal asshole, but at least he had the courtesy to not back into Coach Saunders’ spot.

“Yeah, see, here’s your problem: these teams fucking suck.”

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Roger Goodell also took away the Nat’s 2016 first round draft pick.

No love for Peyton? He made a great throw last Thursday that should be arriving any minute now.

Raiders Give Middle Finger To The NFL

I hope those fans leaving early had a good Dr. Pepper Championship Drive home.

Hello Mudda

15 thousand miles?! Slow down, you’re using up all the fancy too fast.

I like this story; I don’t care that it never happened

The video cuts right before she apologized to the umpire and went over for a handshake and then pulled it away quickly saying, “Too slow.”

I wouldn’t call them overalls as much as I’d call them around-somes.

I knew I'd find someone smarter than Stephen Hawking on Gizmodo.

My dog had the same eyelid surgery as Lisa. They actually had to remove the foreskin from his penis to create new eyelids. He is perfectly fine now, just a little cockeyed.