Because when things go right they don’t make news. If sailors had been killed it would’ve been yuuge news. But since nothing blew up, there’s nothing for CNN to play video of.

Don Juan got deported mid-sentence.

He was a soulless ginger so you can’t really kill something that was never truly alive to begin with. 

If only the portrait had been armed, it’d still be alive.

Sometimes such artifacts of the past are best used as teaching tools rather then be played as entertainment as they were originally intended.

Who let Roger Goodell in the building?

They’ll do that. I never say anything offensive to anyone and try to use reasoning and logic to make my arguments, but I’ve been banned several times because apparently I don’t like Hillary Clinton enough.

NBC/Wall Street Journal typically skews 3-4 points left of the RCP average, but 7-11 points if it’s confirmed by other polling, would still be huge.

That’s simply false. We had no fly zones over northern and southern Iraq from 1992-2003 with no boots on the ground.

We had a no fly zone over Iraq for a decade with no troops on the ground. So yeah...not only is it possible, it happens all the time.

Rudy Giuliani is so progressive on women’s issues he’s fighting for rape victims who claim not to be victims.

I didn’t mean to alert the breaking news again

I don’t know if it was meant to be a compliment

I was disappointed. She had an opportunity to put an end to this election with a decisive victory and she let him off the hook.

when you have to shake your own daughter’s hand because america thinks you want to fuck her

Blink twice if you’re being held against will.

calling for a ground war via no fly zone

Focus Sheeple! Syria, nuclear weapons, and sexual assault are just distractions from the real issues!

I hope I’m better than a lot more than 45%. The average American is an idiot.