I was thinking more Carl Hiaasen, but yeah

Hi there from the Caribbean, where several islands have descended almost immediately into Mad Max-level violent chaos and anarchy. Sorry you’re worried about your dog.

The NYT is reporting that the Mooch was just fired.

As Jefferson Beauregard [Add Confederate Flag Here] explained to us, “Welcome to the Trump Era.”

“Good Friday Spectaculars?” What the ever living . . . This is a terrible day. It is a day of mourning and shame. According to theology this is the day we killed God. And these . . . Christians want to turn it into dinner and a SHOW?

Sexual predators, especially pedophiles and ephebophiles, now frequently use the Internet and computers to expand their reach for victims. There are many cases where a child or teenager has been lured many miles or run away from home to meet their Internet “friend.” They also share their exploits and share victims’…

I wish gun creeps like you would just disappear.

Thousands and thousands of years of history says you’re wrong.

So your brilliant idea is that we all get to pay another fucking fee so we don’t get screwed out of all the fucking fees we’ve paid already? Aristotle was right; some people are born slaves.

Who made you god?

The great thing about most Muslims is that they are more decent humans than their prophet. I wish I could say the same about most Christians.

I’m not sure what these women are thinking when they hire young women as nannies. This happens in less rarified atmospheres than Hollywood as well — I must have heard of a half a dozen situations like this in Northern California. The minute Mommy leaves the house, Nanny hits her knees with her mouth open for Daddy. …

The cat’s anus pursed lips thing?

Snakeface actually used the word “conflate?” How long did it take her handlers to teach her that one? “It’s like ‘inflate’ but with a ‘con.’ Now let’s run through that line again.”

I wondered occasionally what Huma’s mehr was. Apparently not enough to jettison this pervert.

Nah, I’m upset that I’m paying for Daddy’s Eager Fembot, her pencilnecked cover story, and the Lizard Twins’ pocket-stuffing private jaunts. I don’t have the heart to pick on the nudie model. She’ll be the canary in the coal mine when she suddenly heads for Slovenia to “visit family.”

Sorry, dude, this isn’t your manosphere.

Hide your swastikas better.

No, I don’t.

I’m a woman, a wife, a mother, and a self-employed tax-paying American, and I can’t wait until people like you shuffle off this mortal coil. Under your Fuhrer’s proposed “healthcare plan,” it’s likely to be sooner rather than later.