If there’s not a hot demon torn between his love of a Charmed One and climbing the ladder in Hell then I’m not even interested.

Booooooooooo.

On the other hand, all of these installs, updates, and downloads means that you can waste all of your free gaming time just waiting for a little bar to finish filling up.

This is a tremendous comment. Never thought that through. Also, not nearly enough kid & baby zomb-, err, walkers.

Nah, just tie your jaws together with a hankie. No chomping on your partner with your mouth tied shut.  

I have always thought that way too. Or maybe wear Hannibal Lechter masks as a precaution.

Necessary 

That's how you make Buffalo wings. Mix butter and Frank's Red Hot. 

Please do not promote child predators.

I’ve never done this for myself, but when I worked for a Member of Congress, his office was constantly processing requests from constituents for same-day or next-day passports. If you aren’t in DC, I assume they express mail it to you. I don’t know if it costs anything. Anyway, if you are in a bind, call your Member…

I know the first 96/128kbps mp3s we all had back in 2002 sounded like ass, but 256kbps AAC actually sounds really good and I can’t imagine 320kbps sounding *that* much better.

Stupid copyright laws don’t protect creators, though.

This is one of the funniest movie quotes of all time. 

Clearly you’ve never seen “Color of Night”. When Bruce Willis wants to show his penis, that shit is gonna happen, consequences be damned. He’ll even go so far as to construct an elaborate murder mystery around it to justify the exercise, roping in people like Lance Henriksen and Brad Dourif for legitimacy. It doesn’t…

Except you can also buy the iPhone on a 0% payment plan without having to go through the iPhone upgrade option.

Doubtful.

His net worth is essentially his stock in Amazon. He doesn’t actually have access to nearly that amount of money. If he were to liquidate his entire position in Amazon it would have drastic effects. 

You know this was in Spider-Man 2, right?

Just give him all of his powers. Make saving people and beating the bad guys nearly effortless. The difficulty could come from the other stuff. How are you going to give Lois the slip to stop that bank robbery without raising her suspicions? Are you going to stop that plane that’s crashing, or are you going to stop…