You’d think they could afford a better photoshop job. There’s blue on the shades from putting in a fake sky. The trees in the middle window are the same as the far left, but flipped.

There haven’t been this many shaken pens since when Michael J. Fox wrote his last book.

Now if you’re here for a sad penguin, let Werner Herzog narrate this footage of a depressed penguin trudging off into the wasteland to die.

Oh, here it is with the snowflakes again, upset that an actual penguin named Crosby gets startled when a firework goes off, but do you hear them complaining that the same pop caused the player named Crosby to have another concussion? No, no you don’t. smh.

I have a present for you.

Ah, the hypocrisy is thick. Remember when he went after the Khan family and accused HRC of using them as a political prop? Fun times, man. Fun times.

Chris Cilizza is consistently and dangerously moronic. But “Donald Trump understood the applause for Carryn Owens was a moment. And he let it be.” is simply wrong.

you just need to sandwich the meat in between to pieces of cling wrap and beat the crap out of it.

He’s essentially proposing a Federal Department of Hispanic Crimes. It will dovetail nicely with Brietbart’s “Black Crime” site.

DeVos went on to express nostalgia for “nearly full employment of the antebellum plantation system.”

Time for this to go to court. And I have just the man for the job

The 14 stunned birds were later quoted as saying “They were so good at the beginning of the season, what the fuck happened?!”

The Padres say it’s not that bad, but it feels bad.

Levi’s 569 Loose Straight-Leg, because I’m a man, and I lift weights, so girly little skinny jeans don’t work. If you wear skinny jeans, do some squats until you can’t wear skinny jeans anymore.

Levi’s 569 Loose Straight-Leg, because I’m a man, and I lift weights, so girly little skinny jeans don’t work. If…

“Scientific literature is cited to substantiate likely outcomes as a probabilistic function of the two species’ attributes within the battle environment. Attributes considered in calculating battle outcome include temperament, weaponry, armor, body mass, running speed, fight style, physiology, and motivation.”

This is the only one that matters: A 67-animal bracket that pits mammals* against each other in simulated battles to the death** to determine which mammal reigns supreme.

Pure clickbait - that headline make me think this was about Megan McArdle.

It’s a well known fact Hillary Clinton runs an animal slavery/pornography ring out of the San Diego Zoo.

They could but why would they want to? What happens when some idiot loses control of his cart, gets plowed by a truck, and the surviving family sue Nintendo?

I’m tired of being stalked, honestly. I look like 30 out of 36 of those guys. But my generic white male brown haired self is only like 5% of the worlds population. So why do all artists and designers spend all day everyday endlessly drawing me? Its effing creepy.