RIP Derby. We will miss your wisdom, good boy.

They even dragged that old nag “Investigate Hillary!” out for a last stumble around the track! She’s been investigated from here ‘til Sunday and nothing’s been found, you morons! Play a new record—oh, wait, you don’t have one.

voting base is shrinking faster than Roy Moore’s dick at turning-20 birthday party.

Of course they are: they just lost a senate race in fucking Alabama. They’ve utterly poisoned the well for an entire generation that’s going to be voting for the next 50+ years, while their own voting base is shrinking faster than Roy Moore’s dick at turning-20 birthday party.

Republicans are just pissed they couldn’t turn this into a real story because Mueller is actually capable of doing his job.

Going out on a limb here but I’m guessing that the countless old white men investigating Clinton for Benghazi weren’t saying nice things about her behind her back.

Roy Moore doesn’t want to be fed... He wants to hunt!

Something tells me that ref is gonna make it after all.

This isn’t really fair to the Dolphins. The Bucs will be coming off a bye in week 10 and will have two weeks to prepare.

Someone get Sadvillian’s memoirs already.

I once saw a couple smoking meth in the bed of their pickup while listening to Three 6 Mafia, which had a massive confederate flag. The couple proceeded to say, ‘he drives wunnadem Chargers. Porch monkeys love them Chargers.’ This was next to a Piggly Wiggly on a Thursday evening.

Thank you.

Suddenly, a wild hip hop appeared!

I was expecting him to say...”In their natural habitat...”

This is some fuckery. I could write about the white people of Valdosta and it would be far more entertaining. But, of course, everything has to be through the lens of clueless white people who see us as some alien race.