“Of sorts”?

This is giving me flashbacks to when my brother got us temporarily banned from aol for scrolling in a chatroom (among othet things). They used to have a three strike rule. We couldn’t get online! I cried for days, all my friends were on the internet. They thought I had died.

Beautiful people depressed in a beautiful house, I will go see the fuck out of this. Thank you Angelina!

Pizza Ranch.

I was horrified they were tiny mass-produced pancakes. They look terrible.

I just tug on my husband’s sleeve and go “dog...puppy...dog!”

I have to repeatedly tell my husband that we will NOT eat our dog in case of a zombie apocalypse. 1.) I will train him to hunt squirrels and small game for sustenance and 2.) he weighs like 15 and is bony, like no protein anyway. The anemic will inherit the earth because they’re not worth eating.

I once went to a hotel IN THE US where there was a legionniares outbreak...I had to google it. We had a free room from a time share scam so we had to go! But I was scared of the showers the entire time.

Aghhh how am I still in the greys Jezebel.

I have never once in my life felt anxiety over pooping in a public stall. It is a bathroom. Where people poop. That’s what it’s for!

Every year for most of my childhood I would go to church camp for a week in the summer. My friend was with me most of the time as they did weeks by age groups.

Toast stories!

It breaks my heart in a good way ever time. Also I just want to hang out with Drew Barrymore and be besties.

why thankyou!

It is very good and feminist!

Romcoms and Romantic movies that have come out recently that were actually good-to-great:

Which company do you work for again?

I feed them to my dog, who seems to enjoy them.

Oh, yeah, this is the good stuff. When I was a youngin’ we would make “home made bread” (basically frozen dough you buy at the store, let it rise and bake). When it was still warm I’d cut a big slice, slather on some butter, and sprinkle on sugar. I...do have a problem.

Bachelorette was amazing and imo, way better than Bridesmaids.