The moment during which you are being stabbed in the face seven times is definitely a moment worthy of killing the stabber.

I don’t know, man. I’m no gun nut, but a dude getting stabbed in the face a whole bunch of times in his own yard by some psycho the one time he wasn’t packing seems like about the best case for concealed carry I’ve ever heard.

Counterpoint: Hawkeye deserves no respect and is a bad superhero.

Yea well Superman never lost to an FCS team at home

When asked what he’s going to do now that he’s got a 100 million dollar contract, Antetokounpo said he’d carry on the fine Greek tradition of spending all 300 million of it.

What I don’t get is why someone would protest the Anthem of the Country that allows him to make millions of dollars absolutely no money playing Football in the first place. If he really wanted to make a difference he’d donate some of his salary room and board to inner city charities.

Damn. This is a college kid. We’re in good shape.

Cowboy abuses Redskin woman.

I don’t even have a joke. That was awesome. Hope he’s not punished for it

That was fantastic.

isn’t this literally the joke referenced to in the title and then made explicit in the article

Was going to say this, but you did. I will add that I don’t know how much of it is mobile, as Roethlisberger isn’t as mobile as he once was. He’s still slippery, but he’s not pulling any Cam Newton shit at this point. He is, however, a monster who has taken a ton of damage over the years and can mostly deal with it…

The same bias happens to Ben Roethlisberger as well. Like Cam, he takes questionable hits that are never called all the time that would certainly be called on a statue QB like Brady or Peyton Manning. Physical, mobile QBs don’t get the same level of contact protection as the Mona Lisa that the traditional,…

SCHORCHING HOT TAKE RIGHT HERE!

Its amazing how well a QB can play when the defense isn’t continually making contact to his head with the crown of their helmets.

So because he is big and strong he deserves dementia?

Thanks for stepping away from the gridiron for a few seconds to enlighten us, oh wise football sage. You fucking clown.

The point of the list isn’t to tout the US’s dominance... it’s to tout Michael Phelps’s dominance. You mention the relatively short amount of time most countries have been in the Olympics. And how some countries have only been in for 20 or so years (which would be 5 Olympic Cycles). Michael Phelps is in his 5th…

Well, that about wraps up the case, then! Good work, detective!