Your joke? It stinks!

I’m off to round up ten women…

You shouldn’t have allowed a mineshaft gap to develop!

What’s the big deal? Volkswagen have been releasing entire cars of squeaks and rattles for decades…

If he was any more clueless, he’d be writing for The Concourse!

If only there was something you could do with all the inside bits of a cow once you’ve removed all the leathery bits…

Send in Unit 303 to deal with the situation…

Jim is 79 years old and hails from Grovers Mill, NJ!

Well, Long Beach rather than LA…

They call him “Ghost Who Rolls”!

“Who’s a good Donnie? Eh, boy… Who’s a good Donnie? Donnie want a treat? Donnie want his belly rubbed?”

Which is the whole point of this stooge trotting it out. The basket of deplorables aren’t going to check it out and find it’s false; they’re just going to post it straight to Facebook as “real news”…

This deserves so many stars…

Everyone knows you can’t kill a real Phantom!

Still not impossible, but it’s easier just to ship it into Long Beach or San Diego…

If you’re in a West Coast port, don’t bother. The ICBM shit is nonsense; the delivery system will be a 40ft container from China labelled “tractor parts”…

That’s the most believable hair style I’ve seen on him since 1985!

Shouldn’t that be “United We Kneel”, Spike?

I’d say so! If he was really trying to get out, at this point I’d have expected a transfer request, and a requirement that whoever buys him reimburses him for any lost “loyalty” payment.