So really your post should read “My phone plan doesn’t run out for another year = NO PURCHASE” instead of that pompous word vomit about someone, FINALLY, taking a stand against Apple.

Cut to three months from now: Big tech tough guy WHO IS PUTTING HIS FOOT DOWN IN THE GIZMODO COMMENTS The Noble Renard buys a pair of lighting wired headphones for $10.99 on Amazon.

Drew, we know you’re white. There’s no need to list baseball over basketball videogames. Even people who like baseball don’t like baseball games.

AJ Ellis was his personal catcher in years past, but not this year.

“Puig has a big salary, so he’d be somewhat difficult to deal”

Must be nice not to have your religion or ethnicity denigrated by a Presidential candidate every time he gives a speech. You don’t need to applaud; we can hear you patting yourself on your back.

Is Deadspin going to continue it’s editorial mandate of the last two years of >90% of articles focusing on soccer and how you hate Bill Simmons? Because I hate when people go “Ugh, WEBSITE has really gone downhill.” But as someone who’s read Deadspin since 2005 and seen many different incarnations, it really has gone…

All you got for that inflammatory fake title solely designed to get clicks... in a post decrying two of Deadspin’s favorite targets for bad journalism... was 22,000 clicks in 3 hours? Oh, Samer. Working for Nick Denton is not fun.

Good to see Deadspin picking up the torch of 500 Days of Kristen. Lord knows we need a snarky daily column with 17k max clicks that is abandoned the second the writer moves on to greener pastures AKA websites without a 9 figure sword hanging over their head.

Jesus Christ, you are stupid.

No, don’t steal jokes from Dave Zirin and put them in the Deadspin comments. Don’t do that.