When I get onto an elevator with a man larger than me, and we are alone, I am vigilant.

After Christmas, I went to pick up my car from the body shop. As I was waiting, I asked my service rep (early 40s white dude) how was his holiday. He said horrible. He proceeded to tell me that he found out his grandfather molested his aunt (his grandfather’s stepdaughter) and his other aunt (the grandfather’s bio…

My husband ordered an exercise bike last June for the two of us, and I was thrilled, because it meant I could work out without having to go outside and be followed by creeps. He was taken aback when I expressed the reason for my delight.

Seconded. Telling these stories in a forthright way is truly critical.

I know exactly how you feel. I have a class in a building off campus, and there are two ways to walk there. The short way passes by a busy intersection where those assholes with the windshield wipers hang out, and it also passes by a bus stop, and the majority of the walk is over a bridge. There’s no where to go if…

We have to plan our days around not getting raped/harassed just as much as we have to consider traffic and weather.

My husband was shocked when I told him I couldn’t even count the number of times I had been groped by men at parties, bars, etc. I assured him that if he asked any of my girl friends they would have similar stories. Sure enough, he asked my sister in law and she confirmed that she, too, had been groped a number of…

I was raped by an ex-boyfriend in the fall of 2004 when I was 21 and I remember every detail vividly. I was sure he was going to kill me. I had a lot of male friends at the time because I worked in a restaurant and all of us servers ended up being really tight. I’ll never forget when I told several of them about what…

Yes! My boyfriend is 6'3" and realizes how weird it is that he feels comfortable walking around anywhere, at any time of night, in any state of drunkenness, no matter what, and that I can never have that feeling. However, I still believe he minimizes the issue of street harassment, because it’s “just words.” I am not…

The anniversary date can always be difficult. Sending Internet hugs!

I once had the exact same conversation with my husband - “you are a 6'2 ex soldier, no one is going to bother you!” - and he was equally taken back. It seemed to really sink in though, and I think the key thing is to keep explaining these things. Tell our guy friends/boyfriends/husbands every time someone is a creep.…

Vigilance is not enough.

I have 2 means of getting to work (bus or subway) and I’ve taken the bus for the past 2 years because it’s marginally easier, but a recent schedule change has forced me to start taking the subway. I was complaining to my husband (who takes said subway daily) about this and he seemed confused that a change which adds…

This person has trauma related to her experiences and this is how it manifests. I’m so sorry you find women looking out for other women “creepy.” You can easily tell if the person you try to converse with is interested or not. It’s not fucking rocket science.

I hate that this is a truth of being a woman.

My vigilance and suspicion isn’t based on an experience but an assumption that it’s only a matter of time. How depressing.

Before I even start reading—shout out to Hanna Barczyk for the illustration. Really striking.

Viligence is not rewarded; only it’s absence is punished.

My heart just grew three sizes.