Dear Johnny, I meant to write you sooner but I’ve just been busy
You said your girlfriend’s living with you now, how far from home is she?
Look, I’m really flattered you came by the stadium like that,
And here’s an autograph for you, it’s on the front of the Dallas cap
I’m sorry I didn’t see you week 16, I musta missed you
…

As a UNLV fan that’s had to put up with bullshit BYU fans my whole life due to being raised Mormon and just being in the same conference with them;

Dammit Otto, you have lupus.

Your answer is informative, helpful, and non-judgmental. I hate it and I hate you, too.

...a five-person group led by a German citizen...

It’s not Hardy’s fault, he was read the NFL version of the Miranda rights:

The BBWAA’s website looks like it’s as stuck in time as the writers themselves.

Every day, 297 people in America are shot in murders, assaults, suicides & suicide attempts, unintentional shootings, and police intervention.

Practice squad people got no reason
Practice squad people got no reason
Practice squad people got no reason
To live

They got little hands
And little eyes
And they walk around
Tellin’ great big lies
They got little noses
And tiny little teeth
They wear platform shoes
On their nasty little feet

Well, I don’t want no spractice squad…

I don’t know. I can be suede either way.

It’s a shame that after all those cool jobs, he’s hit rock bottom and become the 49ers coach.

Seriously, Deadspin, before all the snark pours in, for stories like this you should be noting the suicide prevention hotline number and other relevant resources.

True, it's not a Seahawks diss track unless Everett and Tacoma are involved.

I finally decided to sit down and try and submit a “WYTS” for the Lions. I’ve considered doing it every year, because wow, this team writes it’s own submission every season just by being Detroit. It was golden...about 4,500 words (and I could have gone on for the length of an average dissertation but stopped when I…

All my dyslexics live in Texas.

Les Misérables

Camouflage is for hiding bird shit. You don’t want potential prospects or the paparazzi to perpetuate pictures of your pioneering pre-production prototype plastered with patches of pelican poop.

He’s an Eagles fan - he’s already dead inside.

Reached for comment Monday, Tebow vehemently denied that he has evolved.