I’m with my boss in Nashville for a business trip. I was ignorant to the reputation I now know my boss has for being the “let’s not stay out too late” guy to immediately turning into “party like it’s 1999” guy. Anyway, point being, I stay out till bar close with him drinking way to much Tequila (fuck tequila) and the…

and yes, i used literally twice in two sentences... i’m an ass

Had a buddy in college (and by buddy, i mean ‘dude who had good weed’) who broke (and by broke, i mean ‘threw a perfectly good bong at’) my other buddy’s brand new flat screen TV during the helmet catch. He promptly left the apartment literally crying. Also, he was the starting middle linebacker for our football team,…