How many can you count in one sentence?

I see your High School Big Shot and raise you a Space Mutiny

Speaking from experience working for a university (both in admissions and in fundraising), they absolutely do open up extra spots after the admission period—but, those are the spots that tend to goo to these kind of underachieving rich kids.

TETSUO!!!!!

Pretty sure that watching that video diminished my blackness by at least 25%, kind of like the guy from Livin’ Large. I’m afraid to look in the mirror.

Perhaps you meant Hakeem Nicks?

It’s just an amorphous blob of punchabilitiy at this point.

That’s what incentive escalators are for, my friend!

Chris De Burgh does not approve of their decision to pay the Perriman.

I loathe Hanlon’s Razor for excusing any number of awful deeds, so I coined the phrase (note: to my knowledge, never heard it used elsewhere) “malicious incompetence/ignorance” to explain situations where those qualities are more of the modus operandi than byproducts of genuine human error.

So, you're proving my point? Thanks, I guess.

What I’m saying is it’s a move that will make the Browns a more exciting/intriguing team, but it’s premature to pencil the Browns in for the AFC title. But hell, more power to them. My team won a Super Bowl with Corey Clement as the leading receiver.

Who are you, and why should I care what you say, and I don’t.

Well, even the turncoat in the suit admitted that route was less secure than going through the athletics department. I can say from my own experience that the sort of quid pro quo that people assume still works is very minimal, compared to holdovers of how things operated even a few decades ago.

Wide receivers have exponentially less impact on a team’s success.

Deeeeep cut. And I, for one am HERE. FOR. IT.

Holy fuck, the irony is so thick it just got booked for a Dove Real Beauty campaign.

“I clean up nice, right?” has gotten me further than any amount of lame-ass lingering “friend zoning” has gotten anyone who actually thinks that is a legit hookup strategy.

The best part was the emotional scarring. That's what my pappy taught me, anyway.

Seems like a lot to give up for a guy with exactly one playoff game under his belt, and 13 points for the team to show for it.