except parenthood, am I right? Barring that, he probably wouldn't have been down with an abortion!

This wackadoo's next law would probably be that all the notarized statements are posted in the state capitol building with a photo of the mother (but probably not the father) in question, protected by bullet proof glass. Because we *need* to know who the whores are, DUHHHH.

PLEASE start an etsy page to sell it! I will buy one!

I hope when they went to do the (not at all comfortable, from my experience) insertion you made a very overt comment regarding penetration and asking your husband first. Ugh fuck that doc, seriously, I hope s/he learned some big lessons that day!

The worst most humiliating can experience I've ever had:

Like my husband wants to one day say to our daughter "any idiot with a penis can make a baby." (which is a generalization sure but whatever) not saying my husband is an idiot, but that having a baby doesn't make one put together. I do think I'm a really good mom (modest is not hottest) but I am really horrible at…

My doctor told me I could fly up to 38 weeks. My mother, however, did not give birth to a fool back in 1984, so I opted to stop around 30 weeks. Go fig, didn't give birth until (induced) at 41 weeks.

I totally respect that. Kid(s) are complete resource suckers. Time. Money. Emotions. Patience. They give a lot of wonderful things back in return, but if anyone is ever entering into parenthood looking for eventual balance in give vs. take they are going to be searching for a looooooooooong time.

I suggest giving her six months of house arrest. Nothing sounds worse than jail EXCEPT for being stuck in the house for a short (seemingly eternal) punishment and not being able to leave.

I couldn't have nailed this better if I used every ounce of wit in my being. I bow down.

Noted. I can't update the post for some reason, but rest assured, I'm not into dragging people across the room.

I should have said "may want to react." And I'm not "fucked up" but it's so cool of you to jump to judgement based on one or two sentences. I never have and never will drag anyone across a room for any reason, I was exaggerating just a bit.

It def made me chuckle ;) and made me want a HMW!

Thank you for reading my mind and telling the record for sale, man or woman.

Totally fair. I also think, likely, that he didn't go from being totally fine to this teen dragging situation over night. As I'm sitting here FUMING about my annoying in-laws, I have to remind myself to breathe and "let it go, let it gooooooo" of course it's not as easy as "well just quit then" but any administrator…

If I'm really honest with myself I can admit that this is how I might also react to some (probably annoying as fuck before this particular incident) obnoxious "but my hair!" teenager. BUT. That's also why I'm not a teacher. I may not drag them across the floor but I do know my fuse is shorter than the average bear. So…

I was young and naive, still trying to figure out what worked for me. I don't do that shit anymore that's for sure, and do I at least get my own hitachi magic wand for telling him that he was a horrible sex partner?

Oh god. I dated a guy with the smallest, most ineffective penis and the body attached to it could absolutely have not tried less to care about it. We didn't sleep together that many times-so hopeless, I kept hoping he would realize what the problem was. And I faked it every time. And he said to me once that "if you're…

I'm certain she did as well. In my twisted mine I think she had it with Asher because she is going to get oregnant and wanted to be sure she could pin it on the rich kid, timing wise. Maybe? Too far fetched?

I realize now how my comment read. I meant it to be more incredulous. Like "this man is the fucking president but he has to play nice with a bunch of crybaby GOPers until his election days are over to actually play ball like the bad ass mofo that he is!" Fuck the GOP. They're like whiney little boys that don't get…