Between this and dating Scarlet Johansson, Jost is really living out the dreams of 17 year old me from 2005.

Yup:

That’s the crossover where one of the bad guys ends up in the newspaper comic and leaves it alone because it’s so slow moving and uneventful, right?

Worth it just for this scene:

The Spider-Verse crossover might be the Marvel event I both hated and loved the most (maybe tied in hate with Civil War II, Electric Rhodey-Killing Boogaloo). The plot was terrible, stupid even, but the non-Peter Parker Spider characters introduced were great. Spider-Gwen alone would justify its existence, but I…

Yeah last time I rewatched it I realized that all my favorite parts were in the first 50 minutes or so, and then there’s a lot of running and screaming and attention drawn to how conveniently empty the island is (If they had to evacuate ALL their support staff, why the fuck did they still commence with testing out the…

The only way a sequel to Jurassic World could be interesting/sensical is if it focused on Bryce Dallas Howard’s character being sued and going to jail for criminal negligence/incompetence.

“So your employees couldn’t find the dinosaur in the cage?”
-prosecution

“That is correct.”
-Howard

“So they...went into the cage?…

He was a dinosaur who got biz-zay! Totally radical! Basically Poochie in dinosaur form.

It’s going to sound silly, but I got so happy when I realized this wasn’t ‘video content.’

When I clicked on this I expected it to be a link to one of those dumb “everything wrong with” videos and I was incredibly pleasantly surprised to find it was not that.

Am I the only one who was a billion times more interested in the idea of Jurassic World as a working, functional dinosaur zoo complete with soldiers trying to commandeer some of the dinosaurs and train them to eat their enemies than I possibly could be in the idea of dinosaurs escaping and eating people again? Like,…

“no one remembers a damn thing about it other than there were dinosaurs and people running from those dinosaurs, and that one of them was Bryce Dallas Howard in high heels. You may also recall some sort of scene where Chris Pratt leads a velociraptor motorcycle gang that you possibly hallucinated.”

“You may also recall some sort of scene where Chris Pratt leads a velociraptor motorcycle gang that you possibly hallucinated.”

A raptor having a heart attack while jello wrestling a ... another dino, is the only thing dumb enough to get me to watch this

...Laura Dern inherits Star Wars.

I like to think of her as Clint Howard’s niece...

Crichton creates Malcolm, Crichton destroys Malcolm, Goldbloom embodies Malcolm, Crichton ham-handedly revives Malcolm, God destroys Crichton. Crappy sequel brings back Malcolm.

Anyone else feel like the spoiled a great scene with the Rex there?

You should put that script in your recycling bin instead.