You know, I could maybe deal with the “I wish we could hit them” conversation in isolation. Obviously, actually wanting to hit students is incredibly not okay, but the tone of the response seems joking and I’m willing to believe that the teachers involve don’t actually want to hit their students and are just blowing…

I can’t think of very many sports that don’t take place among people “playing dress up,” i.e. wearing the attire and protective gear associated with that sport. There’s a pretty darn good reason to wear heavy armor while jousting, given that you could very easily be seriously injured without it.

You know, of all the things my tax money is spent on, I can think of very few that could possibly bother me less than the prospect of freaking WIC benefits, of all things, being received by undocumented immigrants. This is probably because I’m not a sick fuck who gets off on the idea of literally starving babies as a…

Yup. Add in pregnancy and the fact that it looks like she’s leaning forward slightly in that photo, and she wouldn’t really need padding to end up looking like her butt is more impressive than it usually is.

It’s been at least six or seven years, and my cousin still greets me by saying, “Had any good cheese lately?” every time she sees me. I will never, ever hear the end of it. (Which is fine, because it’s objectively pretty hilarious.)

Apparently I once called up my cousin half an hour after taking an Ambien and announced to her that I wanted to talk about cheese.

Crushing on either of the Conchords is not weird at all, because they’re delightful.

Okay. Here are five notable ones among many:

In theory, one could win the Democratic nomination without winning over a majority of voters, if a whole bunch of superdelegates decided to ignore the primary results. However, that’s not really relevant to this election, since Clinton did get the majority of votes in the primary (by a large margin, at that), and…

Liam is very handsome.

Others have already explained this somewhat, but it’s possible for someone with certain cognitive impairments to have a conversation like this:

Okay, but they aren’t all lacking such cognitive impairments, either.

This is an absolutely bizarre argument. Signing a marriage license requires very little mental competence. Becoming pregnant and giving birth require none at all. Raising children might, if you’re capable of doing so well without assistance, but we have no information about her parenting abilities. So what we’re left…

Cases like this make me seriously wonder if the human race is redeemable.

IIRC, the nickname-creation path was Margaret -> Meg -> Peg -> Peggy. Margaret to Meg makes some sense, and Peg to Peggy is fine, but why on earth rhyming got introduced to the nicknaming process for that name and no other common one that I can think of, I can’t answer. People are weird.

Honestly, I don’t think that would change the NRA’s stance at all, either. It might, maybe, finally, embolden some politicians who’ve kowtowed to them for years to say, “Okay, the public outrage on this issue is high enough that the political backlash for me if I don’t support at least some common-sense gun control…

Wow, whoever originally compiled that version of the analogy list is extra obnoxious, since they actually left the initials and hometowns of the authors intact - which means that they absolutely must have read the original list and seen that it was a humor contest, and then deliberately obscured the authors’ names and…

Wow, you have the ability to read the minds of the dead? That’s super cool! Seeing as the actual investigators have never found anything resembling a clear motive for Lanza’s actions, it’s really impressive how you know exactly what motivated him. I can tell you’ve spent a lot of time researching his case, too, what…

Beyond the fact that this is a stupid argument, it’s also a lie, on two counts. First, according to the CDC, which is almost certainly where you got that number, roughly 13,700 people with an AIDS diagnosis died in 2012. The very next sentence on the CDC’s factsheet: “The deaths of persons with an AIDS diagnosis can…

Honestly, I don’t think the various forms of Christianity in the US have less of a cultural component than other faiths, but rather that when the faith you’re brought up in happens to align with the dominant culture, it’s easier not to see that background as a defining aspect of your identity. It’s the same reason we…