All love ends in either a break up or a death. All of it. Some good times may be had in between.

They still bust people for moonshine? Does he have a Tommy gun?

Do an article on this, please. Fiery? Most Powerful? Must be a gawdamn puff piece for easy lampooning.

My friends are somewhat tired of me going on about how all ball sports are boring to me because the same field or court is used every stinkin' time. Change the boundaries, if not the topography. Play football in the jungle; baseball in sand dunes; basketball in space . . . mix it up.

Aww. Crying. Moms try so hard and only sometimes succeed. You were well loved.

I wasn't allowed to have a Barbie. Just a Skipper. But I made friends with a neighbor girl who had both a Barbie and a Ken. They didn't wear clothes or mess with their camper much. They just humped. I left Skipper at home. To protect her.

The spasms of orgasm - not just the tip.

Silflay hrakah!

There is a fantastic group of guys at my workplace who organize the payday Friday happy hours and a twice a year lunch cookout. They don't have to ask me twice to help them.

Hopefully the source of this email can provide some followup on how the whole thing went down. Pleasepleasepleaseplease.

After living through The Pixie, The Dorothy Hamill, The Farah, The Permy '80s Frizz Bomb, The Lady Di (I had them all), can we now agree that it's time to retire the style where the hair is very short and layered in back and long (chin length and beyond) in front? Sometimes there is even a "bump" at the crown. Time to…

Yeah, the shopping for shorts together put it in Penthouse Forum territory for me.

Nondairy creamer is an oxymoron.

This creates a prime opportunity for Japan to discover pork rinds.

In the '70s I was dinged for eating what I thought was free bread in Europe. Stuffed most of a basket into my backpack then got a surprise bill for it. It's a thing there, from way back. They count the buns and butter pats. I was all, "Well why did you put it out, then?" And they were all, "Because people eat it and…

Me: "And what about you?"

"When I get married, my wife will be a virgin," while lying in the afterglow of a perfectly good boning.