I started having memory problems around the second Goldwater administration. My wife can't even remember the second Goldwater administration so I don't give her memories much credence when we have a difference of opinion.

Guarantee that if I go to an NFL game, I'd be the guy that the whole crowd lands on after the fight gets going good. NFL, nyet.

They make special suits to protect people from exposure to things like ebola and management.

Yeah, I would have majored in Literature Science if my school had offered it. I had to get a shitty degree in engineering. Wow, just think, Literature Engineering...man I could make that work...except getting a job in football.

I was sitting here trying to figure out how one can go to college for several years and learn nothing...then I realize that he's not really going to college, he's going to "athletic department" and, obviously, the athletic department hasn't learned anything in the last several decades so why expect the athletes to. …

I give myself a haircut every morning...in the shower. I go through about six blades per month but my head is always like new.

This is an interesting topic and I applaud the concept. With the late spate of intimate pictures and videos that are making it into the wild I asked my 20-year old son if that stuff is going on in our small town. His reply, "Yeah, it starts when kids are in the 7th grade." Hmm, makes me think we need to start this…

When asked for a comment, George Takei stated, "OH MY!"

I think my exact words were, "Son, if I find out you've mistreated a young woman, I.WILL.FUCK.YOU.UP. So far, so good.

If you have a girl you have to make damn sure that you raise her to be competitive in "man world". I know I was, in part, lucky to have a girl that has always been strong enough to succeed when competing with boys, but part of it was just making damn sure that she understood that she was just as good as them. …

A comic that is apparently created by an engineer.

Kanye, I would recommend going to the bathroom and sticking your finger down your throat first. If a good puke doesn't help, then think about the ED.

What is with all these public figures throwing their wives under the bus, of late? It's not just athletes, either, it's politicians, businessmen, everybody. Hey, don't take the blame for all of your own shortcomings and indiscretions, lay it on your wife. I, personally, wasn't raised that way, but I'm old school.

How is this not criminally actionable?