Order a time machine from Amazon and abort Baby Ben.

I have a friend who I can’t get off the Ben Shapiro dick. He’s the type of friend who is really smart but has no common sense. He seems to think Shapiro is smart because he’s a “facts don’t lie” type and tries to position himself as a centrist. Please send help.

Yeah, but who in Louisiana is finally going to have the courage to stand up to big gumbo?

It’s ridiculous that this is even an issue when the district is already running a $30M deficit.

I like to think that Saban doesn’t bother to get to know his staff. So Enos probably told him he was leaving, and after he walked away, Saban thought to himself, “Who the fuck was that guy?”

This is why I will never, ever, work with Nick Saban.

At this point I think it’s 50/50 that Rudy goes full on “Raiders of the Lost Ark” mode when he’s asked about this.

The two federal workers I know agree with you. I asked them both point blank (one on FB and one in real life) if they want the Democrats to just give him the money and move on and they both were like “what, so this happens again in a matter of months?”

This shutdown is a face off between Trumps Ego (larger then the Sun), and his Brain (scientists are still arguing over it’s actual existence).

So last week a 75 year old friend of the family, a loving father and husband, one of the most generous people I’ve ever known, and someone who stayed active and was in great shape for his age, dropped dead from a heart attack. He went to take a nap and his wife found him two hours later.

If you ignore all the evidence, there’s no evidence Trump has done anything wrong.

Bless your heart, dumb-dumb.

No, it was pure snark.

“I ask these things in all honesty, not with snark.”

That’s exactly it. You can’t betray a principle that you never held, and the only principle that Republicans care about (and a slowly-dwindling majority of Democrats, I must unfortunately add) is power. Maybe at some point Lindsey Graham was a true believer in some principle other than Lindsey Graham; I don’t know…

Have had discussions with my wife bordering on arguments when I say things like this. She’s convinced that a lot of this stuff is some kind of Russia/blackmail/conspiracy thing that just needs to be blown open.

Always Haiku Truthers

I’m sorry to be that guy, but a haiku is 5-7-5, not 7-5-7

The shutdown made TSA employees likeable.