"puts her hands on a cursed magic object and wishes that her class crush would fall madly in love with her"

the "yeah" at the start reminds me of rebecca black's "friday"

better have this

she seems nervous.

yeah the second i heard that i was like, someone pls sample this

MAFFIM WAFFIV

Jim,
Jim,
Jim,
oh Jim
Jim,
Jim,
it's time to begin

now his PR agent says it

i am mentally overlapping the kelley talking head scenes from the office with legally blonde quotes plus the oprah "Bees!" reaction .gif - surprisingly watchable

kill me and revive me every morning so i don't have to wait on the fucking F train!

really? that doesn't seem like very good casting.

to think, there was a time when putting two huge jet fuel-filled missles on your person was considered really futuristic.

i'm waiting for someone to break wind on my heart and explain how this is all overreacting and it's not actually cool and not really the future after all and everything's actually just a jar fulla dirt.

every photo of this shithead at the white house looks like he's in a senile fugue state, just walking circles and trying to remember how to use the bathroom

that's actually john travolta doing the flying. he's part carrier pigeon.

According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way that a car should be able to fly.

you can anybody if believe

Very well, where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink, he would make outrageous claims like…

they can take the funds out of my butt

it's weirdly slightly violent