So much more elegant than "pre-pregnant," too.

What IS it with Republicans naming their children after verbs? Not even normal verbs like "Mark." Track? Tripp? Tagg? Sounds like names you'd find going through George R. R. Martin's trash.

Imagine the whole narration in Werner Herzog's voice.

Or you could let her have her own opinions and experience of her own damn children. Like she said, if you watched, she's not letting them go "wild and ruff" while she sits back and thinks how cute it is. I don't have any kids but I know enough not to judge people who do.

Oh boo hoo. Children are little savages. Get over yourself.

I doubt she knew enough to use reversible conservation methods - even professional conservators can cause irretrievable damage. Just look at the Last Supper.

She served alcohol at her wedding, which is only something a shameless harlot would do. She probably even wears ROUGE!

Sure. In rural areas you don't have to sprint to catch the bus.

People! Stop leaving windows open at parties! I'm gonna found Mothers Against Drunk Defenestration and start an ad campaign.

I'm sure the only palatable hospital food IS salt and butter.

Trump's twitter picture always makes me giggle. Like, he thought SO HARD about this, you guys.

Oh god, it's so true. Is it too late to enroll this girl at Columbia for a year to give her some more tortured-oversharer street cred?

I can never hear Ginuwine's name now except in Aziz Ansari's voice. You know, when he comes up in conversation...often...

I think the "this" was the terrible non-interview, not that he actually CAUSED her problems. But yeah, sure, whatever dot dot dot.

And why is there no good Bug Identifier web site? This weird looking beetle shot poison at my cat once and I could not find out what it was after an hour of Googling.

People say they get chills at things and until now I used to laugh, but, today, CHILLS. FOR REAL CHILLS.

Yeah, they all talked about their problems fitting into the community - one had a single mom, others were adopted and they felt like they were treated like outsiders growing up. I really hope it works out for them. I hope their families will at least write to them, though.

Did anyone see the Breaking Amish premiere? I don't know what the hell I was expecting but it was so sad and uncomfortable to watch. Do the camerapeople feel guilty for essentially causing the shunning of their subjects?

Hey, you guys have to put up with a lot from Joe Arpaio.

Wow, competition for the Darwin Awards is really heating up lately.