It could be that I was just joking. And mostly just reacting to the Survivor preview that made it out like Caramoan was snake-shark-storm island. Place is damn near paradise if you ask me.

I cannot imagine a greater possible reward to a starving survivor than the greatest of our foods, the lechon.

I cannot imagine a greater possible reward to a starving survivor than the greatest of our foods, the lechon.

Welcome to the Philippines, US Survivors. It is not nearly as dangerous as the ads make it out to be.

Welcome to the Philippines, US Survivors. It is not nearly as dangerous as the ads make it out to be.

I don't read kana, but wouldn't it make sense if it was "lemon shochu." It would certainly explain the burning.

I don't read kana, but wouldn't it make sense if it was "lemon shochu." It would certainly explain the burning.

Over here in Catholic-land, the distributors cut eight minutes off the movie in order to get a rating that would allow it to be shown in the country's largest cinema chain. Not one second of that deviriginization scene makes it to the final product, leaving the fate of those two characters completely ambiguous.

Over here in Catholic-land, the distributors cut eight minutes off the movie in order to get a rating that would allow it to be shown in the country's largest cinema chain. Not one second of that deviriginization scene makes it to the final product, leaving the fate of those two characters completely ambiguous.

I guess I have to check in. We're devastated. Or something.

I guess I have to check in. We're devastated. Or something.

Being
from a country where Christian groups have been protesting the arrival
of Lady Gaga for her being "satanic," that bit hit pretty close to home.

Being
from a country where Christian groups have been protesting the arrival
of Lady Gaga for her being "satanic," that bit hit pretty close to home.

Replied to wrong thread. Carry on.

Replied to wrong thread. Carry on.

Welp. Looks like we're officially done here.

Welp. Looks like we're officially done here.

I'm not sure it really has anything you might call an A-story.

"…as if these were real teenagers caught in a morbid nightmare, and not
actors in their late 20s still clinging to high-school roles."

The film is fairly entertaining for about two acts. Then the third act arrives and it becomes painfully clear that the movie didn't actually build up to anything. It was just 90 minutes of Johnny Depp looking at things.