This is why I am terrified of getting sent to jail or having anything to do with the legal system. I am trans, and I transitioned almost 20 years ago. But, since I did not get any surgery, I would be put in with the men. I am not a man and never was, and being forced to live with men as a ‘man’ with the potential for…

How do you think they make vanilla extract?

Translation of what he said:

Yep. Don’t hurt our delicate fee-fees.

White tears. So delicious.

White people are so fragile. We have the upper hand in basically every social structure in the U.S. How about we let people call it out without risk of being fired from their jobs?

Man, I have to say, your clit sounds kind of snobby to me, and like maybe its trying too hard to fit a certain kind of demographic.

There’s a special section in heaven reserved for people who have had to deal with old people arguing over change.

When I worked at Starbucks, people would tell me they were allergic to foam when ordering their no foam lattes.

Apparently, there’s a SFW counterpart to Rule 34 - I did a GIS for “mug of chino” (also, let me just say that a top result before I switched to images was Yahoo answers of somebody asking cuz they were too embarrassed to ask their friends what a “cup of chino” was is, well, sad), and I found precisely what came to…

“you’ve never worked with the general public before.”

I’ve been working with General Public so long, he was just Lieutenant Public when I got started.

“How dare you mock the guy for not knowing what the beach is? Some people make it to age 50 without visiting the beach and somehow completely missing the ever-present representations of beaches in popular culture. Besides, many people suffer from Glorpman’s Syndrome, which is an inability to understand the…

Correct. flip-flops where there is no sand within 50 feet, however, are not.

I live in San Jose (so, Silicon Valley, in a state where she had a failed run for governor), and the local NBC affiliate went out to get the public’s opinion on her running. No one knew who she was, unless she laid them off. One guy said, “I’ve never heard of him.” LOL.

Free article idea: find a human being excited about the prospect of Carly Fiorina being president.

Cheesus Christ is one of my favourite pizzas.

Just like Lord Cheezus would have wanted.

If she had ordered a Hawaiian pizza, she would have been on her own.

I like how they saw fit to specify exactly what type of pizza she ordered, and also that she was a frequent customer.