He’s not your buddy, guy.

He’s not your friend, Buddy.

Only difference is that Jordan usually follows that by muttering to himself “I can still take him, though”

I’m listening....

If only he had a strong father figure in his life he would have stopped and made a two-handed bounce pass, which pass would have shown leadership to his teammates and inspired Porter to take a high percentage set shot. It’s too bad the kids watching the game won’t learn proper fundamentals.

Don’t let Kerry Kittles hear you say that!

Supposedly it was going pretty well until MJ started flashing his 6 rings, talking about how the Knicks couldn’t beat him in his prime, and that they haven’t won shit since 1973.

Wait - people think Grant Hill was an asshole? Why not switch Hill for Kyle Singler? And while you’re at it, Danny Ferry is much easier to hate than Redick.

College basketball is better when Duke has a legitimately good asshole star player for everyone else to hate. I know it can be fun to mock mediocre Duke asshole star players as well, but having your villains actually be devastatingly effective at what they do is what makes the fight against them compelling.

Is there any other kind?

Um okay dad

The American way.

Hey, serious question, what do you call a bunch of people taking a day off to see a parade cheering a guy chanting “no days off!”? Is that irony, or something else?

It hit the target, so it wasn’t Osweiler

A still-unsolved mystery: Where did Lady Gaga go after finishing her performance by leaping from the stage and catching a football? Maybe she’s falling still...

To avoid this.

I love the Root on Monday mornings, always ready to take shit head on. Good Morning, Michael!

This was the most inspired move by SNL in a long time. You just know its going to get under EVERYONE’S skin in the Trump Admin. Everyone knows Trump watches SNL like a hawk, here’s hoping next week’s Alec Baldwin ep is 100% Trump jokes. They fucking owe it to us after giving Dear Leader a whole show to himself.

This was pitch perfect. I’m pretty sure the real Spicer would love a podium he could pick up and beat people with.

She was so great; no mistakes, flubbed lines or delays, and total commitment to the character.