In the long history of painfully stretched analogies, you sir have come up with a winner. Great job!

He is the lizard king. He can do anything.

“Body shaming is bad!”
—Jezebel

“LOL, let’s pick a photo where Trump Jr. has a double chin, because ugly!”
-Jezebel

Correction: Everyone already hated Cubs fans openly.

I would pay good money to see a racing series in which you could use these on your opponents.

On the other hand the team, city and fanbase ruined Steve Bartman’s life for something that wasn’t his fault. And you know he couldn’t be at these games and it was probably killing him inside.

Nah, it actually wasn’t. Cleveland losses are hapless endeavors that grab defeat from the jaws of victory (see: the Browns). The Indians were dogged tonight. They fought hard.

There’s no way I’m going to a Brewers-Cubs game at Miller next year. Cubs fans are going to be *so* insufferable.

Some perspective on how historic this is:

You give Belichick a cocktail of these and he’ll field a hell of an offense.  

the Indians never quite threatened, but they constantly threatened to threaten

It’s all a beauty pageant, and Washington is a little Husky.

The south side of Chicago is nothing like this. The United States has no analogue to slums you find in developing countries. Our real estate stock (among other things) basically prevents it.

No need to cross an ocean man, just go to South Chicago.