Can you really blow it if there wasn’t anything there to blow

It’s what happens when your head is a rectangle

Let’s break this down.

Meh. There’s better ways to get out of the greys, dipshit. Empathy is great; try it out sometime!

Meanwhile the Lightning have been the only consistently great team this year in a league packed with mediocrity

“Now you tell me this?”

My friend said “Yinca Dare” to me the other day and I couldn’t stop laughing

The most shocking thing about the grammys had to be learning that Bruno Mars released an album in 2017

hey does anyone remember that american dude that shot and murdered a bunch of people in Vegas?

But it’s not a raise. It’s a bonus that’s heavily taxed. And the majority of these people aren’t gonna get taxed on $1000, they’re gonna get taxed on $200-$300. A one time bonus of less than $150 isn’t gonna help out past that first month.

Gonna take a wild stab and say you make more than $11/hour

Except when they take 46% of said bonus in taxes. Doesn’t seem so good now, does it?

AWOOOOOOOGAH

wait when did Mitt Romney move to Utah? that seems to be an important detail!

Counterpoint: term limits for everyone is a really good idea

They should have considered bitcoin

The crossover between Williams-Sonoma customers and Red Dwarf fans is surprisingly small

“Hmm, seems all right to me.”

Two points:

way to kill a joke there, Captain Buzzkill