Because racists are bad people and she doesn't want to think of herself as a bad person, ergo she can't be racist. In her horrible head.

My fourth grade class put Howliday Inn on as a play. I got to be Harold. It was awesome.

Every Wednesday for me ... when the housekeeper does it for me. Oh my god I am so ashamed.

Okay, I'm going to come at this as someone who had a nutty online emotional affair about 9 months into my marriage. So I guess I'm the dude in this story. Even though it was incredibly painful when my husband found out the extent of it it ended up being the absolute best thing that could have ever happened to us. It…

I think it would be entertaining as hell to just try and get correspondence with him and post that shit on the Powder Room. No need to be in his physical presence.

Yeah, this is why I give the wedding cake. I used to do it professionally and still enjoy it. It costs me $100 in ingredients and saves them $1,000-$2,000. Win win!

It is way worse being fat and tall. They do not make any pants anywhere when you are a size 22 and 6". Does. Not. Happen. At least you can tailor! Nah, really, we're in the same sucky boat. Let's average our height!

I will be so sad if you're just joshin'.

Psst. There are microwave mug blondies ... Go forth and Google in carb ecstasy.

Even though I'm a white lady and have had perfectly pleasant interactions with cops, it has gotten bad enough that I am actively terrified of cops. Their behavior as a whole has revieled most of them to be street thugs wrapped in blue.

I can see that. I worry, though, the way people who have not experienced being more than 50 pounds overweight often assume that people who are that heavy are so by choice. Study after study shows that almost no one in that situation can keep weight off. Who knows why, genetics, depression, but very few obese people…

The fact that the overwhelming majority of obese people cannot lose weight and keep it off indicates to me that it is actually very much out of their hands.

"Go iron your dick" is going in my repertoire.

1776! I love that musical.

Seriously. Tipping is some weird, outdated custom from when we had to bow and scrape to those who were to the manor born. F tipping.

Eep.

I know! I would have done something to make my mom question trusting me to have google back in the day!

I see what you mean. Good kids are good kids regardless of scenario.