...everybody is sick and tired of fucking Anna Wintour.

I read the entire Observer article in Brett Easton Ellis’ voice. It fit the tone very well.

This is also really homophobic. He keeps bringing up gay men in disparaging (and unnecessary) ways. Nobody cares about your gay friend who liked to hit on straight guys and now lives in his mom's basement, Jacques.

I can only hope that those evil, evil editors added some damn commas to his writing.

Next up for Jacques Hyzagi: Director of Communications for the Trump campaign.

Hyzagi, pioneer of schlong-form journalism ...