It's only not true because he never joined it in the first place.

Will Ferrell was Kristen Wiig the whole time.

I thought Caroline was this season's big bad? All she does is cock block.

I don't think he forgot either. Damon just doesn't talk about himself very much. His revenge plan isn't evil in his mind, it's justified (and rather brilliant, honestly), not only for himself, but to avenge Enzo's "death" and suffering as well.

Hey,a woman recently roofied and raped a priest on Days. That's PRIME entertainment value right there.

Speaking of his mom, it'd be rather fitting for her to pop up again now that Matt's had a bit of a windfall, wouldn't you say? Moms like that seem to have a sixth sense for things like that.

Degrading homeless people as wedding entertainment + Personal endorsement by SNL Legends = Public Forgiveness

CharACTORS Welcome

Not until he has a daughter and calls her a filthy little pig he's not. Or I guess a warthog, if he wants to up the ante.

The Greatest Game Ever Played makes me cry every single time.

He was just ahead of his time.

They issue them pocket knives, do they not?

Well, sure. They always want it. As opposed to polar bears, of course.

I still pretend that Frazz is an adult Calvin when I read that strip. It totally works.

Danny DeVito?

Clearly that's the real message Geico was trying to convey here. This woman is so wanton with her porcine companion because pigs possess special genital advantages that we all need to investigate for ourselves. And for that we'll need car insurance.

Laura Bush appeared in a pre-taped segment for the 2002 Academy Awards. First Ladies can do whatever they want. No one elected her. No one pays her a salary.

Only because she already knows and doesn't need to be told again.

As far as I'm concerned, they should have stopped at 2.

Then why would he need to hang it in his bedroom of all places? As an investment, he could literally put it anywhere, including storage, which is where it belongs.