the dishes are done at least weekly,

I grew up in a house that was quite messy. I am not the kind of person who has ever felt comfortable in mess or filth. As a result, it was very hard for me to relax in my own home when I was growing up because I had trouble overlooking counters full of dishes or mold growing on the bathroom ceiling and I felt…

So you can’t answer a question either? I’m having a hard time believing you have a Ph.D.

Wait, her cat has been peeing in the sink because no one will clean the litter box and she’s trying to make us seem like we’re the monsters for pointing out that urine isn’t clean? Gah, if you don’t want the responsibility of a pet, don’t get one!

Wait, what? Who on earth claimed you should kill your cat? Cats do what they want to do, for your health though don’t believe that urine is sterile.

WTF?! No one has said that you need to kill your cat! Also, you stated in a previous comment that the reason your cat does this is because your husband refuses to clean the litterbox while you’re pregnant.

There is a difference between a messy house and a filthy house. In my years working in the child welfare system, in two different states, I have never had a case that just involves a “messy house”. I’ve never had cases where children are removed solely based on the home environment except for cases where the parent is…

I know some women do definitely have this problem, but “I don’t know how to clean” is definitely also Man speak for “cleaning is beneath me.”

yes, getting a degree in a specialized and advanced academic field and knowing how to use fucking lysol wipes is the exact same thing. you’re a genius.

I don’t know you, but if you were my friend I would tell you to tell your husband to go fuck himself. Boundaries are important in a marriage and it’s more important for your kid to grow up in a clean environment than it is for him to have his things not moved. I know this is easier said than done, but laying down the…

Sorry, but I hate when people say, “Pee is sterile.” Yes, pee is sterile, but genitals are not. Urine is not safe or healthy.

you clean up once a week? then your house is not THAT dirty and you don’t know how dirty a house can be if you compare your messiness to this story. my grandmother was a hoarder. my mother is a hoarder. i would never let my child to stay at their place, it is literally dangerous (once i stepped in a huge rusty nail in…

How about you get a housekeeper so your child won’t be embarrassed to have friends over? Or so the parents’ of said friends will allow them to come more than once?

Yeah, no. We’re not talking about a few dishes in the sink and a bunch of clutter on various surfaces and some laundry that hasn’t be folded in a week. We’re talking about filth - so much garbage left sitting that it attracted insects and animal excrement in places animals shouldn’t be relieving themselves. Garbage…

Ugh. Hoarders. It’s such a problem, and it seems to overwhelmingly effect women, and especially women who embrace the role of caretaker. I let go of a relationship with a college friend who sounds like your aunt. She had a weekly maid and her house was still absolutely matted with dog hair, strewn with toys (her…

He really is the only one so far that seems to get it. He knows what he did wrong, but he also brings up a good point about how fathers are overlooked in the system.

The NYT had a fantastic story about CPS and their “Jane Crow” bias against poor minority mothers. That story did a good job of finding black women who had their kids taken away for things like having a little pot on them when they are with their kids or a little kid getting outside on their own-things that happen all…

I’m kinda in the same boat, feelings wise.

Yeah, I had a hard time reading both of these essays.

You know what? I’m perfectly fine with the fact that people who have been convicted of neglect can’t get jobs caring for children and the elderly.