In other words: we’ve already decided on the narrative (Justin Timberlake bad, Janet Jackson good), and we’re not deviating from it now.

Truly a damned if he did, damned if he didn’t situation.  

Alright, now I’m pissed. I was not expecting to have to sympathize with fucking Justin Timberlake of all people today. But that passage there—

This is the only handyman that I recognize anymore.

As Seth Meyers said, by pulling his music out of Spotify, Neil Young is giving up on hundreds of thousands of cents.

“You see: the kids, they listen to the rap music, which gives them the brain damage; with the hippin’, and the hoppin’, and the bippin’, and the boppin’... So they don’t know what the jazz is all about!”

They are publicly traded. It was probably required.

Reviews like this are fun! I have no interest in watching this dreck, but hearing why it’s so terrible is an interesting read and worth the click.

This year’s not off to a great start.

I hope he didn’t compound his misery by watching it too.

Airplane! was rated PG.

The answer is no.

They canceled the Betty White Show because she wanted to showcase a black dancer and the network told her not under any circumstances. She did it anyway and told them to live with it.

It’s quite the blessing, isn’t it? She was literally flirting with Ryan Reynolds just a day ago. Smart and  funny as hell right until the very end.

As sad as this is, I’m glad she never seemed to enter a period of prolonged and extreme decline like so many people her age do. She lived long and died quickly, and that’s basically the dream.

I imagine the F13 devs are just sitting back with fingers crossed that a Texas Chainsaw lawsuit doesn’t start up. 

Unlikely in that game since the production studio wrapped up work on it. But maybe a sequel?

“Hardly anyone has seen” means you can look at their box office returns and see definitively that HARDLY ANYONE HAS SEEN THESE FILMS.

Much as I like the writers here (hi guys) , their top five isn’t actually movies you want to see , its the top five movies that you namedrop having seen to seem cooler.