ANTHROPOMORPHIC FELT PUPPETS CAN’T MELT STEEL BEAMS

kermit did 9/11

Siding with his beloved franchise quarterback once again, Redskins owner Dan Snyder accepted the explanation that an intern had indeed made the embarrassing public error. Rather than fire or publicly chastise the student worker, however, Snyder seized the opportunity to create a dose of positive press for his…

I’m amazed the intern could recognize a little heart considering how much time he spends around RGIII and the rest of the Redskins.

The emails are just one part of the story. To date, she hasn’t been able to effectively communicate *why* she used a private email server, and guess what? The press is killing her for it and her poll numbers are slipping. And as Hillary continues to avoid the press, they’re allowed to set the narrative- and the…

yes, that’s exactly the same thing.

you don’t have to care, but it was absolutely an error.

Lita and AJ.

If Kanye’s job now is to just troll the shit out of Taylor Swift at every available opportunity then I am completely on-board.

Trick question. Not possible. Roger Goodell is not now nor has he ever been alive. He It was cobbled together from leftover bits from Robbie the Robot and an Orange Julius machine. Owners pour whatever they like in the top, and he it spouts out the same shit at press conferences as needed. Perhaps, however, Robert…

Maybe send a minion down to the lockerroom at halftime with a note from Mr. Synder on embossed personal letterhead? That sounds like the way Danny would handle it.

3? Why limit yourself?

lol gonna be so great when Gruden is forced to, once again, bench Kirk Cousins

i know several women in confederate states who also would pick cousins over a black man

Predicted response from pundits immediately upon hearing the decision:

Chip Kelly/Eagles

RGIII is absolutely destined to be a New York Jet, and to flame out spectacularly (but with just enough flashes of greatness to break every Jets’ fan’s heart). Guaranteed to lose two games to New England by a combined four points in 2016.

The last thing running through his head was probably a concrete floor.