As AfroDuck is almost certainly a honky, the NYPD will never, ever, find him.

I bet he just can't wait to to break tackles as an actual (uncompensated) video game character.

Ironman 70.3 is the biggest marketing nonsense ever. It's a Half-IM. That's what it's always been called and should always be called.

From twitter.

If only it was as innocent as a pie to the face... Stay ignorant, my friend. Don't ever change.

Relevant:

Right, you know a "guy"....gotcha.

This dude is the antipoon.

Wow. You have a friend who time travels here from 2005?!?!

The IOC has issued this helpful list of steps you can take to make your voice heard on this issue:

Sometimes the sound is all you need. The rest is up to the imagination.

Dismissing "YOU HAVEN'T TRIED _____ PIZZA THEN" comments because holy shit that's the exact point you mouth breathing morons, you're overly defensive about it and insist every place is the best ever. I was born there and still think it's overrated beyond belief. As a casserole it's solid, but it's not pizza.

The Bears don't get nearly enough shit for Tebowmania, good call on that guy pointing it out. They had a big lead and just played prevent for a fucking quarter and lets the Broncos back into the game. If the Bears hold onto that game the Broncos miss the playoffs.

well I'm runnin' down the road
trying to make an upload
I got 7,000 words about a Vine
1,000 are real tired
50 are inspired
7 are "yup, these are the readers of mine"

They put on a Reds uniform, fell asleep, and then shit the bed?

Jason Dufner was born in Cleveland.

What will it take for AL fans to realize they're playing a baseball-like game that involves a bogus gimmick?

My retirement grease!!!

Like Ralph Waldo Emerson said, "great spelling does not make up for a bad tie"

With a phone call and a good story, probably.