Ahem, ‘whoever that is produces explosive results.’

You’re giving him too much credit to ask that, even in jest. This isn’t about him not caring or being personally biased or catering to anyone. This is about propaganda, pure and simple. And I know you know all of this - I’m not trying to be pedantic - I just wish we could all start calling this what it really is. The…

Yeah okay but for real, it’s not the hair and makeup that’s the issue. It’s her ugly fucking face and her ugly fucking soul and her dog-torturing-and-murdering racist, misogynist, lying family. Not that this Scaramucci guy has any right to comment: He’s a fucking oil slick poured into a sack of skin.

“Look. I like you. But you’re, like, a 4 out of 10. That’s not good enough to beat spicey’s ratings. Definitely not. So you need to get up to at least a 6 out of 10. Hit the gym, cut back on the McDees, tan every once and a while...you know. Actually care about your body and appearance. Unlike now. Where you obviously…

In some cases it’s less a “lack of empathy” and more the fact they’re completely cut off from the real-world, something that affects both sides of the aisle.

My father had brain cancer, and the way John talked reminded me of him it made me cry.

He will “realize” it publicly, and then vote for whatever the party line wants. Then release a statement about how “troubled” he is about it.

Sarah Palin will come with her rootin’ tootin’ guns and shoot that cancer right out of his brain!

John McCain is one of those Senators that I feel most conflicted about. The guy went through shit and torture and for years was a moderate in the GOP but recently his devotion to Party Loyalty (seemingly thinking he’ll get something in return) has seen him hypercritically vote on bills for years now (similar to Ken…

I’m hoping that old DJT takes too big a snort of nose candy and has an aneurysm. Mike Pence then comes in, sees what he think is Pixie Stick dust on the desk and licks it up while Mother isn’t looking.

Hello, God? It’s me, spike. If you’re up there, can you give us a win down here? I agree, we suck as a species, but some of us are trying to do the right thing. So, just this once, can you cut us a break? Please?

He moved on him like a bitch.

Take a look at President Deals over here. Big deals. Huge deals. Just the best. Tremendous. You’re gonna be sick of all the winning and the deals.

A Play in Four Acts

Any “if Obama did/said that” comparisons end in impeachment or riots. He was held to a higher standard than any other president in my lifetime. I’m sure his skin tone had nothing to do with it /s

Christ, that picture... 

I feel you, I’ve been out of work for over a year and I’m currently living in my mom’s basement. Fuck my life. 

Also known as That Hinterlands Look, seen on outstate relatives’ faces when you use a four-syllable word or suggest that the giant corporate megaprocessing plant down the road might be the reason they can’t drink their tap water any more.