God, as someone else said, why can’t they just say something like: “Look, we fucked up. We’re sorry. This is a learning opportunity, and while we will try to do better in the future and in the course of resolving these horrible events, that in no way atones for abdicating the responsibility we owed the the students…

Also, could she cite her sources on what exactly Baylor has done to rectify things and “do better”? I mean, she repeated some form of that statement a few times: We’ve fixed the problem—how? We’ve responded aggressively—how? What actual changes have been made to institutional structures?  Just firing people and…

she’s still refusing to apologize for stealing Christmas, though.

Let’s see if I can help:

This whole thing was clearly calculated by her.

Wouldn’t it be refreshing if for once, someone who said something really stupid and wrong simply said; “What I said was stupid and wrong” instead of trying to hedge it, justify it, double down on it, pretend the words meant something else, or otherwise piss on our legs and tell us it’s raining?

It was the perfect set up for her “apology”. Look like you haven’t slept in days, don’t wear makeup, etc. That school is so god damn tone deaf it’s almost comical at this point if it weren’t for the fact that 50+ FUCKING RAPES have occurred.

First call I’ll make if I’m in charge: Kobe Bryant. Because Kobe understands winning. He understands, also, these players, you know? And so I would call. “What role you want, bro?” If you got a day, just give me that day, I’ll take that. Whatever time he has, I want him to come and be a part of it.

Shit, if I’m Dolan I’d be afraid to walk past his grave a decade after that funeral.

I wouldn’t fuck with Oak at his funeral.

“The thing is, Bob, it’s not that I’m lazy, it’s that I just don’t care. ...”

As a Bulls fan, these jokes are funny now.

Listen, if they wanted to know specifics about how things were run the person they should be talking to is the Specific Manager.

This is the appropriate unified response. “You’re not concerned about fallout, Ms. Gordon? Ok. See how unconcerned you are when nobody covers your barely-mediocre team.”

Don’t you think the face wipe to the devil is kinda harsh? I know he’s probably done some stuff you may not agree with, and in 2016, with this vicious internet culture we all have to navigate through — a culture where every word, typed or spoken, every picture, video or snapshot — is under such intense scrutiny that…

Only his dignity and credibility.

I’d be willing to bet there’s a lot of NFL-caliber athletes who are ‘bout that life’ but get caught or killed a lot earlier than Hernandez. Seemed like at least for a while he was better at keeping a lid on it.

Do Your Job(s)?

Every time I hear about the death of someone so young, it’s really upsetting because why can’t death just take Dick Cheney instead?