When I was very young I went through my mom’s purse looking for candy or gum and found flexible wrapped packages. I opened it and found something gum like but clearly not gum, perhaps some sort of gross ‘natural’ adult fruit roll up? No, still not right. I showed it to my mom and said ‘what is this? Is this gum? This…

I love this. My husband’s parents are crazy hippies. He could never throw anything out in the fridge because it was always some mystery concoction. His mom is making her own kombucha now, which worries me a great deal. Also their fridge broke a while ago and instead of replacing it, they are surrounding the milk with…

When I was 12-13, I had discovered that I could use the internet to talk to people. My parents, who knew I was a precocious child, decided to install a spyware on the computer that would let them know everything I wrote, including awkward conversations I had with other preteen boys on IMVU (remember IMVU???) about…

My birthday is April Fool’s Day.

Back when I used to go to church with my mom, she would answer the pastor’s rhetorical questions. As in he’d ask something like “and who among us has not sinned” or some shit, and she would yell “I AM A SINNER, THANK YOU JESUS”. Which would’ve been fine if it was that kind of church, but it was not, it was one of…

When I was going to be a freshman in college my mom randomly told the Best Buy sales associate (male, naturally) we were buying a computer from that I would be starting college as a virgin. “How often do you see that?” she asked. Probably never mom, or more specifically...no one else in the history of ever has thought…

My dad was a pretty serious LOTR nerd before it was cool, i.e. before the movies came out. He read all the appendices and books by Tolkien’s son annotating his father’s notes and books about the linguistics and collections of artwork about Middle Earth. Two of these artists were particularly considered to be experts,…

How soon is too soon to ask BAG out? I mean, I guess I have to wait until the divorce is final or whatever but do you think I can send him a Save the Date card along with a nice bowl of fruit or something?

THIS IS ACTUALLY EXTREMELY IMPORTANT TO ME

+1! While I was watching this, I could hear my mother’s voice in my head saying, “That’s why we put things away when we’re done with them,” in a very smug tone. Finally, she’d think, the bears have come to prove me right.

A single mother of 5 just wants to relax at the pool for a day, is that too much to ask, little girl? Chill.

That wretched child’s mother is a ray of sunshine, compared to her daughter. I can ALMOST hear her glee over the bears in the pool and the distress it’s causing her family.

If the little brat had put her toys away, the bear wouldn’t be eating her Bubble Guppy car...

“maybe 95 out of 100 people that walk past me smile at me or look happy or start laughing, or say hello,”

Although, it does look like she paid for hers to remain upright.

I’m offended that anybody would ever willingly choose to walk through Times Square.

My father went through Ranger school when he fought in Vietnam. I talked to him about these women and he is very impressed by them. He thinks it great that they made it through because he knows how hard it can be. A thing I found interesting is he talked about how important it was to develop relationships with others…

Wait, so HotHousewife4u@geocities.net isn’t your primary email account!?

Misspelling of hotmale.gov.uk

Raise your hand if the following names seem way too familiar :