We do, however, want to avoid arson-shaming.

I SHUT THE BEDROOM WINDOW BUT NOW THE RACCOONS ARE UNDER THE BED!

Those passages don't seem all that similar to me. Certainly not enough to be outraged over without having read both books and seeing them in context.

No, you're definitely not alone. One of the most overrated writers of his generation.

I for one welcome our new uterus overlords!

Bringing new meaning to "shutting that whole thing down"!

NOPE! SLUTS! All sluts! Sluts who fuck entire football teams every weekend! Those are the only people who need birth control!

This is not exactly true, but it's exactly the reason why our government doesn't work anymore.

Inexcusable Thighs is another great name for a riot grrrl band.

If you start telling people to go listen to Led Zeppelin, you are officially An Old.

Don't get me wrong, I love Zeppelin and they have written some of my favorite songs and albums. But that is like, the #1 harbinger of Oldness there is in America.

I just don't understand it. Her actual self aside, she is a beautiful woman with a sexy body. She could be sensational if she were dressing for the body she HAS.

OMG THIS IS A THING?!?!? I just thought my bum hated me and wanted to annoy me by making me have to deal with period blood and a messy bum at the same time. Ok. I'm not weird. Cool.

Exactly. Are you paying per polka dot?

Yeah, because her doing the "dead starfish" in bed has nothing to do with you or your sexual skills. Nope, nothing at all.

Yo dude. If you are so concerned about your significant other acting like a dead starfish in bed, methinks you need a primer on basic female anatomy/erogenous zones because she's clearly just not that into it.

You just explain it to her that if this behavior keeps up then there will be consequences. That's how I've done it.

"How... how do you know how it feels to fuck a dead starfish?"

So fucking a living starfish is cool?

YEAH. Goddamn her and her lack of aging. She still looks like Willow.

Punishing drug addicts in general works so well. I mean, they all stop using drugs immediately once they learn they will be punished.