Elmo has a recurring comedy special now? Too bad Sam Kinison is dead.

Parker, Jr.

I remember.

Unvarnished elder-statesman treatment from Rick Rubin:

Eh, anything goes in the countdown to the Kinja takeover. And I mean anything.

Based on the photo, you have to be severely balding to be a Secret Service agent.

She's going to law school and I'm hoping, what with her dad's neglect, she'll turn out to be a radical feminist Marxist lawyer to spite the family name.

Why, she'd use the money to reanimate Vince Foster and kill him again!

'Til the American Trump-stapo kicks down their door. Midwesterners are stubborn like that.

Bannon's a pretty big fall guy to use up this early in your downfall, Donnie.

I wouldn't say "morals" so much as you're too dumb to realize that words have consequence on some key bottom lines.

Meh, the series has nowhere to go but down after Katy Perry's Unplugged set.

The commenting community, it slips away…

Those gators have the cutest little snouts.

Yes, I'm grateful it's not just all white women making that kind of bank in the business.

I'm more of an xhamster man, myself.

But she has yet to pick a role in a movie that PantsGoblin would ever want to see. Why aren't you tracking that, Forbes?

Because people like to socially interact over films, particularly strange or misguided ones. You know, like we do on these boards.

Never a good sign when they cast a 28-year-old model to goose interest.

Or maybe he doesn't want to insult the work of his friends in the industry out of courtesy?