Because he’s a flaming asshole?

Because he's an ass?

For a second there I thought a fan threw a hot dog onto the field.

Brooks had one year remaining on his deal at $4.5 million, which the Thunder will now eat.

Help what? Your constant masturbating?

Nice to see Cano is on board with the whole trying to shorten the game thing.

.

Because of title 9 all athletics players would get paid the same.

Strong take.

It will also work if your name is Dr. West Friendship.

“Sure, I appreciate it, Dad. Giving me a football with my own autograph on it just seems a little odd.”

Koch Industries is headquartered in Wichita.

He wants to make Wichita the 51st state.

the kochs donate heavily to universities all over the country. they particularly like donating to schools that are a. in kansas or b. have conservative or libertarian leaning economica and poli sci departments

He was born there and still lives there.

I enjoyed this response:

To ensure that our great nation never runs out of irony.

Aaron Rodgers in one of the biggest moments in the state's history

Hey Captain! Open up! We've got to install these microwave ovens!