The unidentified Baltimore police officer 

Well the blue line isn’t even running into DC and the orange and silver are barely running. I assume most of these people can’t afford to stay in DC proper and *won’t* stay in PG County, so I’m kind of hoping a lot of them are too dumb to understand metro and get lost or delayed.

When I worked there like 10 years ago, I was the only white waitress. 

I’m not who you’re talking to, but until Uber Eats existed, businesses would rarely deliver to my neighborhood, with Dominos being the exception. It’s annoying, but after this happened to the delivery driver that came to my house, I have never complained or lowered a tip over it. https://www.washingtonpost.com/local/po…

Yeah, as long as you generally have similar interests, it’s only a thing if you make it a thing.

I am also a fan of wearing shirts that say things.

I don’t know, I’ve dated someone 14 years older than I was, and I think the only learning curve was when I taught him emojis. 

i guess sparky polastri had to change his name to fernando after being run out of southern california.

As I’m typing this, I’m tearing down curtains to make a dress. Together with the rod will be my part of a disguise.

lol all these comments about public transportation being cheaper, but i guess no one lives in the dc suburbs, where it’s $1.50 for a bus and then $5.85 for the metro.

ooh if you haven’t tried nars eyeshadow primer, get a sample at sephora. i can go to soulcycle AND cry (usually at the same time), and my make up is still flawless after. it has changed my life.

naaah ill keep waxing and sugaring it off.

this robot would be more helpful for saving relationships. at least for me.

My bookbag would make the seatbelt alarm go off in my passenger seat, to the point I cut the wire. Have schools converted to all e-book, or are these stupid bags just gonna rip?

I would like it a lot more if it came with a blank line, allowing me to write in my own tormentor from work.

Oooh. I volunteer!

Fun fact: rats ate my ex’s car engine when he was parked at his own house in DC. Sucks to be him!

Don’t BBC, Bloomberg, and New Yorker use Wordpress?

Ah, did you see my original post? It’s crazy, right? I’ve been roughly the blonde in my tiny thumbnail for years, and it is much more lucrative for me than red hair. It’s like they get confused.